Tales of the Terrible Twos

Managing stress 

These situations can be difficult and may also be overwhelming especially when it appears out of nowhere : The meltdowns in public. One of many anxieties that a parent has to deal with is the screaming, kicking, in public areas. Why is this happening? They have not been able to master the ability to regulate their emotions AND express their feelings clearly therefore, they will demonstrate various amounts of tantrums. Their needs are not met, this is a possibilty.

Run a checklist in your head (are they thirsty, do they need affection such as hugs, kisses, reassurance, positive language, explain or describe what you are doing today especially when it has nothing to do with the child such as food shopping which may certainly be boring to them. Activities that are physical may also be a way for a child to wear themselves out and release any kind of negative or emotions/feelings they are unsure about for example, sleep deprivation, hunger, bordeom. You may try to give them a snack, a toy, a book or anything they are attached to in order to keep them feeling motivated or content throughout a pram ride. As many parents know, toddlers struggle to stay still in their strollers due to the fascination of being able to walk and run freely. Always give them reassurance about the journey even when they are not able to talk; use key words with a highly expressive tone of voice : nursery, park, shop. Consequently, elaborate on how far it is : next door, nearly there, around corner.

Simplify these instructions and directions for your child to understand fully the intent behind your outing to avoid confusion which may lead to frustration. Always remember that your child is a little human with a growing brain and this needs to be fed constantly and consistently. Your little one deserves this type of interaction throughout the day to provide social and emotional needs. If your child attempts to get out of the pram; breathe. They just need a bit of stretch or run around; if it is safe to do so, allow this to be a "break" from sitting down. Try to stay calm during these moments as this is apart of the gentle parenting process and moreso : coping mechanism for you, as a parent who struggles physically and/or mentally. 

Jean Piaget stages of development : Pre-operational 

According to Angela Oswalt, during the symbolic function sub-stage, children should be able to picture, remember, understand, and replicate objects in their minds that are not immediately in front of them. In other words, children can create mental images of objects and store them in their minds for later use. In relation to this, the aspect of the terrible twos is a normal part of a child's growth and social awareness. A child under 5, is like a puzzle, the pieces are scattered because learning skills takes all types of the lifespan development to be placed together as a whole; after this, there are layers and categories in each type of development. One must be mindful that sometimes the onset of terrible twos can occur 6 months prior to a child's 2nd birthday and the duration is highly dependable on family background (more precisely, home settings, education, nutrition). 

Using negative connotations/ promoting healthy relationships

This can be a very tough pill to swallow but the terms "bad" or "naughty"  your child will not feel comfortable with expressing themselves in their later stages of childhood (3 - 7 years). Identify first why there is a meltdown in order to make a decision about healthy options (talking it out, calming down yourself before giving them a reprimand and taking your time to find proper alternatives to deal with it.